Angry, Disappointed, frustration, Happy

Can't tell how lonely am I,
Can't tell how sad am I,
Can't tell how suffer am I,
Can't tell how many tears I have,
Can't tell how I feel now,
Can't tell how much I hope for it,
Can't tell how much I love you,
Can't tell how much I like you,
Can't tell how much I willing do for you,
Can't tell how I fall for you,
Can't tell how many I want from you,
Can't tell why,
And this is everything between you and me.
And I still think that it not yet end,
Why?
Already 5 years, Why can't just let it be and end it now.
I hope this hard time fast fast pass, I need brand new life and new friends,
I want throw away all old things.
I'm envy, I'm jealous, I'm greedy,
I hope you can call or meet me, not just sms and msn to tell everything clear.
How much I want from you just like how much you want from me.
I'm not a stock or a things.
I'm human, I should hv my own right and feeling.
Dun be so selfish can o not?
Not everythings you guys say, I do only, I follow only....
I'm tired with it.
5 years, you want together with me how many times?
Can't we just be friend and go yam cha?
Friend cannot go dinner and movie?
OMG... What you really want from me?

I hate this feeling,
I hate the feeling I feel like nobody want me.
Am I so worse?
How many days you want me to be unhappy?
Why you always like spoilt my happy mood?

I'm happy when I go gathering with friends in Wok and Pan on Saturday,
I'm happy when I play pool with my friends,
I'm happy when I celebrate my friend birthday on Sunday night,
I'm happy when my friend come from KL on Monday.
But all my good mood and happy mood spoilt by you.
I'm not sad or what, but I hate the feeling like dump by people.
If you not sure, why can't we decide when we meet.
I already told you that, but you give me confident.
I really angry with you.

Everything is just happen on 4 days time.
Great. I'm only a person worth 4 days?
Confusing with this world and life.

Another things make me feel so speechless is...
My mum say I'm too young to fall in love..
I'm 20 next years.
Is normal for a 20 years old girl to have boy friend,
I where got too young?
I really hate this feeling... When my parents think i'm too young.
20 still young?
Why I'm legal to club?
Why I'm legal to drink and smoke?

Noone can understand me. I really dun have a piece life and happy ending of this year.
Walao... The conclusion of this year need how many words to write it down...
Really... Speechless.....